Excerpt: Incompetent Gods by Gabriele Russo
Enjoy reading an excerpt from chapter 5 of Incompetent Gods by Gabriele Russo.
Incompetent Gods by Gabriele Russo
Excerpt from chapter 5
Gaelin Taslin, vice-president of God’s Incorporated, stepped outside the executive teleport chamber into the atrium and groaned. Today was “ananthropomorphic day”: once a month, the gods got to take a holiday from humdrum humanoid shapes and look any way they wanted. Since most gods are versatile shape-shifters and/or have god-awful taste in clothing, this meant that temporary blindness or at least a good headache was lurking around every corner. It was meant to boost morale. It usually sank his.
Ganesha, in his elephant form, was squatting half the room (he couldn’t get into his office); a big bull with golden horns and equine legs was chatting with a human receptionist and a squiggle and a blob were arguing near the coffee machine.
Nothing to help Gaelin’s usual disgust with the rest of the décor.
The public floors of the building were a Molotov cocktail of casino and music hall: overworked friezes painted in silver and gold accentuated the garish and mismatched colors of the walls; pinball machines lined the mazelike corridors and strange sculptures by Helvetian madmen occupied every available nook.
The orgy of sights and sounds (not to mention Ganesha’s BO) brought on another wave of dizziness. Gaelin shook his head and decided not to take a bobsleigh. Looking downward, he made his way to the conventional elevator. He heard its doors start to slide closed, and jam; he lifted his head. Satan was waiting, holding them open. Gaelin almost made a dash for the stairs, but there waited infinite dangers.
The prince of darkness was in full regalia: horns, tail, cloven feet, goat beard, red skin, midnight tuxedo, and for some reason, a multicolored pucci-like cape. The best-dressed man would look frumpy beside the angel. Gaelin, wishing he were blind (again), could feel his well-travelled three-piece suit wrinkle in shame. His nose did the same as soon as he got on the elevator, revolted by the cloud of perfume Lucifer used to cover his sulfuric smell.
“Hey Gaelin! Buddy! You’re just the man I want to see,” said Lucifer with bonhomie.
Gaelin sighed. Of course this wasn’t a coincidence, it never was.
BOOK INFO
Incompetent Gods
By Gabriele Russo
Book 1: Gods Inc. Series
Fiery Seas Publishing
December 13, 2016
Fantasy
In a dimension created by the ancient gods, most are now stuck working at Gods Incorporated. CEO Queen Louhi Pohjola, a mortal demigoddess turned vampire (on a diet), holds the planet in the palm of her hand and while she cannot by any stretch of the imagination be called a nice person, there’s worse lurking in her shadow.
Goblin, a bitter hybrid with childhood issues and shape-shifting abilities, has a grudge against the world. First on his to-do list is getting rid of the Queen and take her place by forcing the titan Ba’al to devour her.
As her friends and allies fall one-by-one into Goblin’s traps, the Queen’s fate seems inevitable. With no one left to fight, will Ba’al’s friends, a bunch of over-the-hill incompetent gods, be enough to stop Goblin from turning the world into hell?
AMAZON ~ BARNES & NOBLE ~ KOBO ~ iBOOKS
Gabriele Russo, AKA Lucie-Gabrielle Jolicoeur-Rousseau, was born in Quebec City amidst a family of book lovers – her father had dreamed of being a writer and both of her brothers are published authors.
Since she earned her Bachelor’s in History, it was no surprise (except to her) that she ended up working in restaurants, eventually owning two, which almost drove her mad. She sold them and was nursed back to pseudo-sanity by Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett. That’s when she answered the family calling and decided to write. Armed with her ideas for the Gods Inc. series she went back to the University and got her Master’s in Creative Writing.
She now lives with her husband in Culpeper, Virginia, where she divides her time between painting, ripping apart and reconstructing her recently bought historical home, playing tennis and, of course, writing more books.
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